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Becoming Family

March 6, 2023

Watch Halima and Iqbal's story

When the Taliban took over Kabul in August 2021, Halima was in Afghanistan with her two young daughters.

We saw the flags of the Taliban on the rooftops everywhere, it was very hard,” said Halima.

They waited in Kabul to be evacuated for two perilous months.

“When I left we were happy because we were going to escape the Taliban regime, but there are a lot of women in Afghanistan and a lot of girls like mine,” Halima said through tears.

When I left Kabul, that was the hardest day. I left and said ‘I can do nothing.’”

Feeling helpless, Halima and her daughters were evacuated to Qatar, later staying in Germany, before flying to Minnesota to reunite with Halima’s husband, Iqbal, who was already in St. Cloud through the Fulbright Program.

The hardest thing for refugees in a new country is not knowing anyone and not being familiar with the culture, so you feel you’re on your own, and it’s really hard,” said Iqbal.

Arrive Ministries staff provided Halima and Iqbal with household items, and helped the family get settled. Arrive Ministries connected the family of four with a volunteer couple, Dennis and Denise, through our Good Neighbor program.

“Denise and Dennis came to our house and they welcomed us very warmly and kindly, so on that day I felt that they are good people and we can be friends,” said Halima.

“Iqbal and Halima have given us the privilege to step into their lives; that’s what we see that ‘Good Neighbor’ volunteer as being, that ability to allow them to step into our lives and for us to step into theirs,” said Dennis.

“When we first started getting together it was more a question of ‘What are Halima’s needs?’ She would need to get to the grocery store, do some shopping, and other practical things. Then, it just developed more into a friendship,” said Denise.

A significant milestone occurred on Halima’s birthday when their friendship blossomed into a more familial relationship.

Dennis told me that I am a kind of daughter to him, and I told him that I would love to have an American father and mother,” said Halima.

When the Taliban killed 50 young Hazara women taking their college entrance exams a half a world away, Iqbal and Halima gathered Denise, Dennis and St. Cloud community members to stand in vigil for the women and the Hazara people, an ethnic minority group in which Iqbal and Halima belong.

“It hurts a lot and we know it is our responsibility here in America to make our friends aware that we are from this group that is targeted, and women are targeted in Afghanistan,” said Halima.

Iqbal shared that the safety and security they feel in America is often tainted by feelings of guilt.

I’m here, I’m safe, but how about other people? We could’ve been there in that situation,” said Iqbal.

That guilt alongside gratitude and compassion for others still suffering, are common feelings many refugees experience after arriving to safety.
Dennis and Denise are moved to tears when reflecting on the emotional burdens their new friends carry.

“We have not had to deal with even a fraction of what they have and I am so impressed and blessed by their genuineness, their openness, and their willingness to share their story,” said Denise.

“I think it’s the start of something that can be a forever thing.

“(I hope) they have all the opportunities and blessings that we’ve taken for granted all of our lives, because they’re here,” said Dennis.

In restoring Iqbal and Halima’s sense of safety, they have found a new freedom to dream.

“My dream for my daughters is they have a better future and life here, and are able to pursue whatever career they want to,” said Iqbal.

 

Watch a bonus interview with Iqbal and Halima about the treatment of the Hazara people and women in Afghanistan.

 

 

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Arrive Ministries is a refugee resettlement agency providing essential services and practical assistance to refugees and immigrants to advance self-sufficiency. We mobilize volunteers, in partnership with local churches, to extend love and friendship to our new neighbors to promote thriving in a new homeland.

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